Once you know something it is difficult to unlearn it. As a child I struggled to understand why innocence would be bliss, surely all knowledge is useful and knowing how, if and when to use it? Gone are the days of my childhood innocence when life was simple.
Do we choose what we want to know? There are many things I wish I did not know and are stored in a dark vault at the back of my mind. Occasionally they surface but wish they were never there in the first place. No matter how hard you try it will influence and haunt you. As an old soul that’s why memories are wiped but for some of us those imprints creep through as events trigger what we once knew.
Sometimes I envy the innocent or a young soul who doesn’t know, the burden of knowing too much renders my silence on many matters. Not because I don’t have an opinion but because I know the outcome. Learning to step back when it’s not your battle is difficult and knowing how far you can step in is a balancing act. Wanting to help but realizing you do more by taking a step back.
I get asked questions I know the answers to yet I cannot reveal what I know. Sometimes it will not be what others want to hear or they are not ready to hear.
Then there are things I know that cannot be proved; what do I do with this knowledge? It helps me understand why certain things are but the knowledge was only for me. I wish to share but I know I cannot, quite simply because no one would understand.
To have a simple life and a quiet mind is something I have not experienced yet I imagine it to be bliss.
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