People have regrets; it’s human. If you could go back and change things, would you? I used to think that we learn from experience and many things are predestined and we live under the hand of Fate. While I still hold these principles, I do believe we also have free will and make choices that affect our path.
Often we are convinced and told to accept the past and learn from it; it’s wise advice. It doesn’t mean that if we didn’t have the chance to do thing differently we wouldn’t and that we still can. My experiences have shaped the person I am today, if I changed things, would I now be a different person?
I would feel less guilty as a child for being a financial burden to my parents, pay more attention in French and Classics (even though I was always in the top 10 in my class, which was the top class of the year) and listen to my instinct rather than my peers and try to fit in. These are only things you realize in hindsight. I couldn’t wait to grow up and chose an easy and quick degree to leave home and enjoy University life. No one expected a huge recession though. Degrees were then useless, so I quickly learned the harsh realities of life.
I don’t think it’s too late to change though. I will find funding somehow to go back and do my law degree, which as a teenager I was probably not emotionally ready for anyhow, I can travel to places I have always wanted to see and money, while we need it, it really doesn’t bring happiness and you can’t take it with you.
The only things I would change is faith in myself and to not do things to please others. Only when you get older do these attributes help guide you in everything you do, because in the end, you have to live with it, no one else and you owe it to yourself once you know what you could change to doing it. You can’t change the past, but from those lessons learned, you have already changed things and from it, rewrite a future of your choice.
© 2015. S.T. Alvyn. All Rights Reserved.